He cant EAT or DRESS!?

My boyfriend (since may '08) is turning 27.



1. clothes-- he barely has any: 2 pairs of jeans, a couple of really casual tops and 2 nice button downs. He has a pair of sneakers and a pair of material slide on shoes that are also very casual. He might own a suite but he does not own nice shoes.



2. eating habits: At restaurants he eats like its a race and ALWAYS cleans his plate no matter how massive the dish and he can't eat a salad without leaves sticking out of his mouth.



He's a wonderful guy but his inability to dress and eat a certain way do inhibit him. For example, my mom is taking us to eat steak at Ruth's Chris...he is SO excited but he did stress out about not having the appropriate attire and I'm wondering...but you're 27! You should at least have a nice pair of shoes! (sneakers at this place would be highly inappropriate)...and I'm also wondering how he will eat there-- last time we ate at a nice restaurant I was a little embarrassed at the massive chunks of greenery sticking out of his mouth.



I have absolute no desire to "change" him but do want to help him incorporate some nice clothing items into his wardrobe for 'special occasions' and want to help him learn how to not eat like a cow munching on grass....



How is the most polite way I could do this? I'm def. going to buy him a basic nice pair of shoes for christmas, lol, but I cant buy him all his nice stuff and I dont know how to help him with his eating etiquette !He cant EAT or DRESS!?
Just leave the dude alone and let him live his life. Stop judging him. The best Christmas gift you could get him....from what I am hearing you say....would be for you to break up with him and let him find someone who can accept who he is.



Poor guy!He cant EAT or DRESS!?
i think you should be honest with him.



tell him that when you go out to eat he shouldtry and take "smaller bites". explain that this also helps when carrying on a conversation during dinner. explain that YOU dont want him to CHANGE, just alter his eating habits a little for the environment.



also mention maybe a little shopping spree to help him find appropriate attire, and offer to go with him. While you're there pick a few nice shirts and slacks and maybe suggest a pair of shoes to finish things off. Tell him this way he will have choices, the day you are going out to dinner he may want to wear a different outfit then the one u guys picked, so having a couple is good.





this way you wont hurt his feelings or seem pushy, offering your opinion (not help) and NOT telling him what he "should" do is the best way i've learned.



i dont think you are being judgemental at all, i understand where you are coming from. my family goes out to nice places and such and my xbfs could never measure up to my family or even my expetations for who i wanted in my life. i found a great guy that can drab down and dress up... with a little help of course :D